BUDAYA  

Cerpen (Masih) Cinta

Karya Mohammad Farid Fad

FOTO SASTRA 34
(Ilustrasi: Budiono/Jawa Pos)

“RUD, Tante minta tolong temenin Cinta ya. Kebetulan Tante sama Om ada acara ke luar kota mendadak.” Terdengar suara halus wanita di ujung telepon.

“Iya, Tante. Emang Cinta mau ke mana, Tante?” sahutku.

“Cinta harus kontrol, Rud. Nanti Tante kabarin lagi alamat dokternya ya.”

“Siap, Tante. Hati-hati di jalan ya, Tante. Salam hormat Rudi buat Om,” pintaku.

“Oke, take care ya. Makasih, Rud.” Pembicaraan sore itu pun ditutup tanpa salam. Entah, mungkin saking keburunya Tante Ani.

Ya, aku memang terbiasa memanggil wanita itu Tante Ani. Wanita yang sudah aku anggap ibuku sendiri. Ia masih terhitung muda, kira-kira seumuran 50-an. Namun, wajahnya masih cantik. Makanya banyak teman-teman Cinta yang bilang bahwa wajahnya sangat mirip ibunya. Karenanya, menurutku, Om Amrul termasuk pria beruntung. Sebab, wajah Om Amrul tergolong “sederhana”. Ya, bisa dibilang pas-pasan lah. Namun, Om Amrul bukan orang sembarangan. Ia dikenal pengusaha sukses.


Hari pun beranjak senja. Aku harus jemput Cinta tepat waktu. Kalau tidak, omelannya khas cewek posesif yang menjengkelkan siap menyambarku. Dan betul, aku telat. Jalanan memang nyaris bak takdir, tak bisa diprediksi. Seperti dugaanku, ia menghujaniku dengan peluru cibiran yang tak henti-hentinya.

Aku hanya bisa tawakal menyimak. Bak rengekan anak kecil, toh nantinya ia pasti kesal dan berhenti dengan sendirinya.

“Kok terlambat kenapa, Rud?” selidiknya.

“Kamu katanya sakit, kok kelihatan seger gini?” tanyaku mengalihkan pembicaraan. Sengaja kualihkan kiblat pembicaraan demi memblokir rasa ingin tahunya. Selain itu, jurusku ini kulakukan karena aku tak menerima omelan-omelan selanjutnya.

“Gak tahu, Rud. Alhamdulillah, aku baik-baik aja kok. Cuman mama wanti-wanti aku harus kontrol tiap bulan,” jawabnya singkat. Sambil nyetir, kulirik jemari lentiknya tengah sibuk menari-nari di keyboard handphone. Untunglah.


Terdengar dering handphone. “Maaf, Dok, saya izin keluar bentar. Mama telepon,” pinta Cinta.

“Oh, silakan,” kata dokter itu.

“Maaf, Bapak siapanya Cinta?” tanya pria berkacamata tebal dengan baju serbaputih itu.

“Saya Rudi, calon suaminya Cinta, Dok,” sahutku.

“Begini, sebenarnya saya ingin membicarakan hal ini langsung ke Nyonya Ani.”

“Tante kebetulan ada keperluan mendadak sore ini, Dok.”

“Tapi, ini sifatnya penting dan menyangkut masa depan Cinta,” tukasnya sambil membetulkan letak kacamatanya.

“Kalau diperkenankan, dokter bisa memberi tahu saya. Nanti akan saya sampaikan langsung ke Tante Ani, Dok.”

“Oke, begini, dari hasil pemeriksaan USG kemarin, didapatkan adanya tumor pada indung telur.”

“Maksud dokter?” sambarku memotong penjelasannya.

“Hmm,” dehemnya dengan suara tegas yang keluar dari dagu sedikit terangkat. “Iya, Cinta kemungkinan sulit untuk mempunyai keturunan,” lanjutnya.

Kucoba membetulkan posisi duduk guna menghalau ketegangan mendadak itu. Tersirap darahku. Agak lama perasaanku teraduk. Hampir saja aku kehilangan separo akal sehatku.

Suasana hening seketika robek. Tak terasa, derai air mata begitu deras mengalir dari kedua pelipis mataku.


Sejurus kemudian, aku keluar ruang pemeriksaan. Jemari lentiknya tengah sibuk menari-nari di keyboard handphone. Untunglah.

“Udah, Rud?” Ia menatapku heran. Menaksir-naksir tubuhku dari dahi sampai ujung kaki seolah belum pernah kenal sebelumnya.

“Kenapa kamu?”

“Magku kumat, perih banget. Yuk, nyari makan,” jawabku spontan guna mengalihkan pembicaraan. Sengaja kualihkan kiblat pembicaraan demi memblokir rasa ingin tahunya.

Dalam perjalanan pulang, aku hanya bisa diam sembari sesekali mencuri pandang ke arahnya. Kerling lentik matanya dan katupan bibirnya. Rambutnya yang lurus terurai, parasnya yang elok, serta kulitnya yang kuning langsat. Rasanya tak salah aku meminangnya. Mendadak ia terenyak menoleh ke arahku. Tatapanku bertemu dengan pandangannya yang sedang menggerayangi maksudku. Ia melebarkan senyuman. Senyumnya menggerogoti tubuhku.


“Cinta berpotensi tidak punya keturunan, Mir,” kataku berusaha to the point kepada Mirna, sohibku sejak sama-sama kuliah. Aku terpaksa harus curhat ke dia karena dia satu-satunya sahabat yang kupercaya.

“Aku bingung harus gimana, padahal aku telanjur bilang sama om dan tante kalau lima bulan lagi kita nikah,” suaraku makin parau, menunduk kehilangan harapan.

“Telanjur? Maksudmu?” Tampaknya Mirna mengherani tekadku.

“Iya, aku memang bermaksud melamarnya Juni depan, tapi…” Perasaanku kalut. Aku tak bisa melanjutkan omonganku sendiri.

“Untung kamu sudah tahu kondisi Cinta sekarang, kalau tidak…” Gantian Mirna yang tak bisa melanjutkan kata-katanya.

“Kamu harus mengambil keputusan sekarang, Rud. Kasihan Cinta. Sebelum semuanya terlambat.”

“Tapi, aku harus gimana, Mir?” tanyaku memelas.

“Kamu harus menentukan dulu tujuanmu menikah, Rud. Kalau tujuanmu demi melanjutkan keturunan, tinggalkan Cinta. Tapi, bila maksudmu adalah demi melegalkan romantisme percintaan kalian selama lima tahun ini, nikahilah Cinta.” tegas Mirna.

Aku hanya bisa terdiam. Aku hanya bisa membayangkan kerling lentik matanya dan katupan bibirnya. Rambutnya yang lurus terurai, parasnya yang elok, serta kulitnya yang kuning langsat. Rasanya memang tak salah aku meminangnya.


“Kamu tega, Rud,” suaranya terdengar meninggi hingga napasnya berdesakan. Bunyi seruput ingus berkolaborasi dengan tangis histerisnya yang makin menjadi-jadi.

“Lalu, kenapa kamu mutusin aku? Alasanmu apa? Kamu udah punya wanita lain?” Otot-otot wajahnya tampak menegang. Matanya melotot tajam menuntut keterangan. Seperti dugaanku, ia menghujaniku dengan deru pertanyaan retoris yang tak henti-hentinya. Ia menangis sejadi-jadinya.

Di antara derai air matanya, sekilas kulihat garis takdir memijar di dahinya.

Aku hanya bisa menunduk pasrah. Sesekali tatapanku bertemu dengan pandangannya yang sedang berusaha menggerayangi maksudku.

Ia menatapku dalam ketidakmengertian. Aku tahu ia bisa mengerti, tapi tak bisa menerima. Namun, aku harus melipatgandakan rasa tega. Ini keputusan terberat dalam hidupku. Aku hanya bisa pasrah. Mengimani takdir yang tak mengenal kata seandainya. Dalam hidup, tampaknya selalu ada peristiwa yang terjadi tidak untuk bisa dipahami.

Kekalutanku membuat air mataku tak kuasa menetes. Memang lelaki tak elok menangis. Tangis itu konon mengurangi keperwiraan. Namun, bagaimana lagi. Semangat hidupku nyaris runtuh. Kerongkonganku mendadak terasa gersang. Hingga dunia pun terasa memunggungiku.


“Adik kelas berapa?” tanyaku kepada sosok perempuan mungil di depanku.

“Kelas satu, Om,” jawabnya polos.

Kerling lentik matanya dan katupan bibirnya. Rambutnya yang lurus terurai, parasnya yang elok, serta kulitnya yang kuning langsat. Perempuan imut ini mengingatkanku kepada Cinta. Entah di mana dia sekarang. Yah, rasanya tak salah dulu aku pernah meminangnya.

“Mama lagi di mana, Dik? Kok sendirian di mal?” sahutku iseng.

“Itu,” katanya sambil menunjuk sosok wanita yang tengah membelakangiku.

Aku memang terhitung penyayang anak kecil. Dari bangku ruang tunggu, aku masih perhatikan anak itu berlarian ke arah mamanya. Wanita itu hanya menoleh sekilas ke arahku. Tatapannya bertemu dengan pandanganku. Ia tampak melebarkan senyuman. Senyumnya menggerogoti tubuhku. Aku menatapnya tajam dengan segenap ketampanan yang pernah bermukim di wajahku.

Kerling lentik matanya dan katupan bibirnya. Rambutnya yang lurus terurai, parasnya yang elok, serta kulitnya yang kuning langsat. Hanya pinggang dan perutnya yang terlihat sedikit berisi. Semakin lama semakin jernih ingatanku tentang dia. Rasanya tak salah lagi, Cinta! Wanita yang dulu kupinang. Bukankah?!

“Kok melamun, Rud. Ngelamunin apa?” Bisikan Mirna menyentak kesadaranku.

“Gak papa kok, Sayang. Magku kumat sepertinya. Yuk, kita nyari makan, perutku laper,” jawabku spontan guna mengalihkan pembicaraan.

Waktu memang telah mengubah segalanya. Hari-hari seolah berkelebat begitu cepat. Aku sadar, salah satu hal yang mengeras dan harus segera mencair adalah kenangan.

Mungkin hanya perasaanku yang tinggal di ruang kedap waktu yang bernama kasih sayang. Menebas waktu dan melipat jarak.

Tapi, bagaimana mungkin Cinta punya anak. Sementara aku dan Mirna yang secara medis sama-sama subur sudah tujuh tahun belum juga punya anak.

Entahlah, aku hanya bisa pasrah. Mengimani takdir yang tak mengenal kata seandainya. Dalam hidup, tampaknya selalu ada peristiwa yang terjadi tidak untuk bisa dipahami. Wallahu a’lam bis-sawab.***

(Jawa Pos, 11 Oktober 2020)

Mohammad Farid Fad: Pengajar FITK UIN Walisongo Semarang, pengasuh Ponpes Raudlatul Muta’allimin Kendal, pegiat literasi di Tarbiyah Librarian Club.

Sumber: lakonhidup.com

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